Many of you already know that on March 21st I had a major heart attack. It was not only a shock for me but for those who know me. I have been living a very healthy life style and this was totally unexpected. I had no history of heart problems before BAM, there it was.
After I got home from the hospital, I wrote a letter to many of my friends and family. I will put it into this blog because I want women especially to be aware that the classic heart attack symptoms don't always show up. Women, please be aware of your body and listen to its signs. I am so very grateful I did and was willing to dial 911 in the middle of the night to get help.
Here is my letter....
My Heart Attack Experience - Elizabeth Merriman
Friday night, March 21, 2014, I had a major heart attack. I want to record my thoughts and experiences, not only for myself but also for my family and friends
I received gifts from God through this some what startling event and I don’t want to forget.
I went to bed around 10 PM having taken something for what I thought was acid reflux. At about 10:30 I was very nauseated. I stayed in the bathroom for about 1/2 hour with terrible nausea, sweating and shaking from chills. I thought I was being sick from maybe food poisoning or that I had the Norivirus Flu. I got back into bed at about 11:00 with a bucket for being sick and a towel for my sweaty face.
Only then, did the symptoms of a deep ache in my throat and across my shoulder blades happen. It felt like a lump in my throat as if I felt like crying, only more intense. (Actually, on recollection, I had been experiencing a milder form of this ache in my throat on my morning walks during the previous 2 weeks. This was so strange. I would ask my self, “Why do I feel like crying when I am in such a great mood? I did not link the ache in my throat to my walking and the elevation of my heart rate.)
This is when, I believe, God put this question into my mind.
"I wonder if I am having a heart attack?" It was with a sense of wonder, not fear or dread. I did call 911 and asked for the paramedics to come and check me out.
During this time when I was alone and waiting for help, I was not afraid. It seemed like a very long time before they came… actually it was between 10 to 15 minutes. (They said they would have gotten to me sooner if the medical dispatcher had said a possible heart attack, which apparently, she had not.)
I had a sense of peace, it was a sense of calm and I knew that what ever would happen to me, I was being held in God’s loving hands. I realized that this may be it, I might be dying. Although, I wanted to live, it would be OK if I did not. I was current in all my relationships, I had no unfinished business. My family was in a good place. I had no big concerns. It was if I was ready to go to the next experience if, indeed, this was what was going to happen to me.
This sense of peace and God’s presence was not dramatic but quiet and calm…. it is hard to describe. It is similar to the feelings I get when walking along the shoreline and being reminded that God is big and I am small and God is in charge. I don’t need to effort but just be where I am at the moment.
Once the paramedics arrived, things moved very quickly. The health care professionals did an excellent job at getting me to the help I needed to survive.
I was rushed to Kaiser and was in the Cath Lab about 15 minutes after I arrived.
I now have 3 stents in my Right Coronary Artery. It was completely closed.
The blood flow and oxygen has been restored to my heart muscle and it is expected that my heart, with time, will grow back most of the damaged cells.
This has been a sobering event for me. I have been blessed with excellent health for all these years. My mother died of a stroke in her early 50’s. It has been very important to me to do what ever I could to stay healthy. I have eaten a plant based diet that is very low in sugar and fat since 2007. I don’t drink or smoke, walk 2 miles daily and generally practice a healthy life style. No one could have been more shocked than me upon hearing this news. I was the “poster child” for a very healthy 77 year old.
Now there is a “new normal”. I turn 78 this month and my life will be different.
I am not sure how this will look. It will take awhile to get my energy back. I came home from the hospital with 6 new medications for my heart. I carry nitroglycerin with me in case of another “event”. I need to take my blood pressure daily. I am no longer the “ all powerful, healthy, strong athletic woman” I once was.
I use the words “sobering” and “new normal” to convey that I am not depressed or morbid about these facts. Once again, I am blessed with a sense of gratitude for what is and the gift of being able to be in the present moment and celebrate the fact that I am alive. I have received so much love and support from my family and friends. It is carrying me through what might have been a very tough time for me emotionally.
God is good and “It is well and it shall be well”.
I am so very grateful for all the love that has been coming my way. It is almost overwhelming! All the notes, calls, rides, flowers, food, hugs, prayers, warm welcomes on and on.
Friends and family are so important to me and these past weeks have reminded me what is really important in life... LOVE.... my relationships with God, Family and Friends.
A sweet card from my Granddaughter, Elsabet
Just some of my many cards and flowers.
A Page from My Gratitude Journal
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